hello.

sometimes good. sometimes bad.

sigh...





havent pack yet. though shifting in less than a week. my room is in a real mess. scary.

finished the 2nd week of school. and seriously its kinda the first time i ever felt so ?? during lessons. the stuff being taught and all..


chinese can be quite chim after all..


but stillllllll... after 2 weeks of discipline, i am VERY proud to say that...
i havent been late for class!! in fact, most of the time i was early by 10mins. theres once that i even reach at 8.35am. hahahaha.



:)


okayyyy i am slowly but surely changing okayyyyy.. :)



---------------

edit. just right after i blogged this, surina said this,

coming to terms with it..
slowly.



i can do it.
i can do it.
i can do it!

did i mention how proud i am of zimu? he is so amazing with all those art stuff..! seen him drawing and all since sec 1 and hes really so talented. really looking forward to his solo exhibition in the future. :)

amazing huh. known him for 7 years alr. my ex-monitor together. he used to bully me ALL THE TIME. and i used to hate him so so much in lower sec. even cried before so many times. lol. and it fills me with so much joy seeing him doing what he is best at and doing it so well. :)


amazing how little efforts actually go a long way. :)




really glad too to have YDL and val around.. :)

19岁，代表了什么？

今天看到一个小孩，熟睡在妈妈的怀里。可爱的脸，躺在妈妈的肩上。非常地安全... 我的心笑了。在他还小时，都一直会有妈妈撑腰，有妈妈的保护。

相差19岁的我，不再怎么可能拥有他的世界了。

成长意味着什么？

我的成长路上，是怎么样的？

很多路，是要自己走的。

很多时候，在最彷徨的时候，是不会有人在身边的。

很多的夜里，最深的痛，只有自己能明白。

很多的经验，是要彻彻底底地伤透了，才会体会到它可以给的力量。

在很多的泪水中，才会真正明白很多人生的道理。

在心里乱到极点时，真正的平静才能涌入。

前面一定还有很多未知的路，需要自己走的吧？

勇气，你每天都陪着我好吗？

（我没有在emo，不要乱想。只是情绪比较多而已。）

life is like a combination of ??!?!?!?!, huh???, what!?, grrrrrrr sometimes.



just one of those days when i really dont feel like doing anything or talking to anyone.



咬紧牙关，忍。


but i still have an essay to complete.. :(


rantttttttttttttttttttttttttt.

i was totally on a high after the match...


:) :)

2-0 and i screamed like mad at home. lol.

and fb went crazy with all the man u vs liverpool thing. seriously funny. lol.




it has been a tiring dayyyy.

had ktv with mum and uncle and aunt and cousin.


it was a seriously unique experience. me + cousin kept exchanging looks and giggling away. so our session consisted of loads of hokkien songs, veryyy old songs and all.

so i was very excitedly singing all my usual songs, and most of the time i couldnt even sing pass the 1st verse because it was too funny. my mum will always sing with me and she ALWAYS sing with those 老调 you know? and the songs all sound like some oldie! i was seriously loling away most of the time.

and they really aunties sia. go one ktv they brought two big bags of goodies. with beer, chrysanthemum, cans of drinks, peanuts, biscuits and all sorts of stuff. cos they wanna 'party' away. haha. seriously cracked me up.


and seriously, i think teo heng is like the best ktv around.






i've been sleeping before 1am for almost two weeks now. save for a few odd days. and of course today. but i still feel SO tired everyday. why?!

its really a riddle that i cant solve. i thought all mums say 早睡就会有精神? how come i feel the opposite?

but nonetheless, i am still gonna keep up the habit. i'm pretty proud of myself actually. those who know me, i've been sleeping at insane timings almost for like the past 3 years. so its a hugeeee change.


going to turn in now. :) nowadays it feels better to be asleep than being awake. lol.

sigh...

:(

i have never ever thought in my whole life i would experience this.





this is so so hard.

what if i cant do it?
what if my heart fails me?






"we shall come forth as gold."

up at 745am and snoozed till 820am before getting up. lol.


feels soooooo good to wake up so early to get some work done!



yayyyyy. i'm gonna finish some serious stuff today..!

haizx. sometimes i think i'm too in my own world. that sometimes i just dont feel like talking.



anyways, i'm really quite excited for school to start tmr. haaaaaa.
challenges!

the only sian thing abt sch reopening is that need to think of what to wear everyday.
sianzzzzzzz.






tingtinggggggg! you got to grow up!

i have a sudden craving for these rock candies in all the rainbow colours like right now. :( or like in pink and purple and all the bright happy colours.


been having headache/giddiness since after dinner and it feels like these candies will just do the trick.


one day i'll remember to pass by clarke quay.

theres seriously at least three houses under renovations now around my block. or at least i can constantly hear three drills drilling away freely. and one hammering away.

and i've been feeling so arghhh till just when i decided to just pop the pills.

ranting ranting ranting.

dear unit from above,

you've been drilling nonstop since 10am now. and thats almost 5 hours now with only 1 hour lunchbreak. i planned to have a quiet and nice and peaceful monday. but you kinda spoilt everything and i cant help but be VERY irritated now. it is my last week of holidays and i just wish that you would drill next week instead when i'm like in school at the faraway west when i cant hear your drills. and of all rooms, you got to drill the one right above my current room. i wanted to read but i cant concentrate. i wanted to watch my shows but i cant hear them talking and had to use earpiece. i wanted to pack my room but you are so noisy its driving me crazy. and of all days i dont feel like going out today! i would REALLY appreciate it if you would stop drilling and maybe like, paint the rooms instead or something. havent you guys heard of monday blues?! :( :( :(

from the very angry and disturbed and sad tingting.

thoughts thoughts thoughts.

today was lying on my bed.. thinking hard.. reflecting.

those inner struggles..

. . . . . . . . .

control control.

withdraw withdraw.


sometimes you just need time.
and you'll realise how stupid everything sounded.



i really need you God.

today i started off my day by sitting down and writing down my objectives for the day. and at the end of the day i sat down and was very happily ticking all of my objectives 'done'. happy. :)





同样一个妈妈生出来的, but woah.
i realised the stark difference in our strengths and weaknesses recently.

today was just sitting in the car gazing out of the window.
and i realised me and my sister are SO different.
different in ways i've not noticed before.
what i'm strong at, shes weaker at.
what shes strong at, i'm weaker at.
no wonder she cant stand me sometimes. lol.
cool man.


----------------------------

is it me?
i'm just not excited abt such stuff anymore.
hmmmmm.

so.. i officially finished 5 whole seasons of The Hills today. i'm NOT going to continue with the new episodes with kristin cavallari in it. i love lauren and kristin is just different. so without lauren = no more hills for me. i miss lauren though. :( i think she has got character.. out of all these drama mama in the show. she actually turned out good.

and i LOVE her hair for some reason. lol. kristin doesnt have such fab hair.

okay anyway. so i'm at The City now. its a spinoff from The Hills.
i LOVE erin's hair and bangs. seriously.

so i told caryn, and the convo went like this:

ting: now i'm at the city. its a spin off from the hills.
caryn: ooohhh hahaha got village a not?


NICE ONE LOR. lol!!! she cracks me up with really random stuff randomly!

the little talk with xt on sunday.. it was good.



"look for people with depth, the truth is that there are very few people with depth out there now."



yep. everybody and everyone can be all nice and good.
and they are not bad people.
but.. its rare to find people with depth.
people with substance.
people who think.



depth. wow.
i want to be one.

its crazy all these feelings i've felt recently.



that it makes my everyday long baths become almost therapeutic.

praying praying for you.


keep going keep going.

keep fighting.


stand strong stand strong!


there IS a light at the end of every tunnel.


最美的愿望一定最疯狂
就算失望不能绝望

i am really so proud of my sister. she graduated with first class honours and all. so proud of her! :)

she really inspires me sometimes. not like all the time when shes being irritating. but yeah other times she is really quite inspiring. haha.

i let myself down all the time.


GOD..!!!

the bus is by far the most comfy i've ever sat in. totally enjoyed it with music in my ears and curling by the window seat seeing the night pass.


and FINALLY satisfied my soy chai latte craving.


one of my most traumatic experience for this trip. it took me more than 15-20mins to overcome my fear and get used to the fishes sucking at my feet.


i was really tense up.


xt say i always pose like this. hahaha.






satisfied our a&w craving! root beer + curly fries + waffles&ice cream. :)


this guy always always makes me laugh. hahahaha. everytime i see this photo i laugh! hahahaha.





kt: i have tingting withdrawal syndrome.

sweet huh. hahahahaha.


KL trip was funnnnnnnn. it was my first time ever being flung upside down in the air for so many times! it was traumatic as well! i always have this fear that my safety belt will suddenly give way and then i'll fall out and die. haha.


and i think i bought a nice bag. haha.

and i think the guys maximized their manhood. hahaha.

but i couldnt find my cardigan though. :(