hello.

rewind.
why do we always want to rewind?to erase the past hurts?and to do everything again so we wont make the same mistakes again?



but how sure are you that you wont make the same mistakes again given the same circumstance?its because you've seen and experienced the aftermath that you realise its a mistake no?



what does it take to truly understand the art of moving on.to learn.and not be stuck at that point in your past forever?



in the end,we are all trying hard to live our lives to the fullest.and theres no point regretting when life doesnt allow you to look back and rewind.you either stay at that same point or you move on.

was just randomly surfing the net and i saw someone saying no matter what state is this world in,we still got to hold on to hope.

hope: a wish or desire accompanied by confident expectation of its fulfillment.

hope is so powerful no?just when everything is not going right,we'll hope.

but yet,being too hopeful make us vulnerable to the situation now.

theres always two sides in every situation i realised.

when no one's at home..the much needed peace and not afraid of being intruded.

the quietness.

i wanna tidy my room.its so messy.but i dont know where to start..and what/how to dispose of.

after that week when God spoke to me..i was so determined to change.and yes,little by little,step by step,i am changing.i feel most of my rebellion and stubbornness leaving me.theres still alot more to change for i'm trying hard to change my attitudes now..attitudes first.then talk about making a difference.in my family.i dont believe in 'cant be done'.it takes effort and pain and time,but it 'can be done'.



cherish.

hahha.i havent been online for days man.it feels weird but cool at the same time.realised that technology is so important like seriously..but then again,a break from it is coool.haha.like back to communicating by phones that kinda thing.haha.

was flipping(yes,flipping,not reading.lol.) through last week's time magazine and it was on food,like how it actually reflects the world and the condition we are all living in now.and wow its really cool.haha.next time after i read then i shall elaborate.haha.

moscow is the world's most expensive city for the second year in a row!35% more than new york man.something new today.

and the big apple is actually new york!haha.a bit lag.

yay i updated.lol.

HAHAHA.yay!some pictures!so you wont get bored.hahaha. :)


hahaha!with jp!i realised i have alot pictures with him.hahaha.AND!his belt got i love you one okay!lol.


hahaha!actually i posted this up because i think ying's pose very funny.haha.like fantastic 4 that guy with long legs and hands.haha.

hahaha!huiying extra can hahaha supposed to be tp only!haha.

yay!3rd! :)


hahaha!this is so lame man.our ben and jerry's vouchers.haaahaha.

vivo city!kinda cool in the rain.haha.yulan's finger.

eh this is so funny.haha.in the end the picture turned out weird weird but kinda artistic!hahaha.

in the bus going expo!haha!

cell group picture.haha.if you get me.

hahaha!wah i did one of the most unusual thing today i went out to eat with my mama and her friends!haha!and i thought it was pretty cool..

they were like talking how they were looking forward to the holidays but then its gonna be over so soon.then they going back to their schools and all and must ren those people again that kinda thing.haaa.btw,they are pri sch teachers.haha.

and when i was listening to them i was pretty amazed.cos here are they..middle age or even like my mum,50+ almost half of their lives gone.and they are still pretty much lost and without any purpose in their lives.going through life as if its like a must-do.and at the end of the day,looking forward to that paycheck only.

half of their lives gone..and what have they accomplished?its pretty sad to say that the answer is,nothing very significant.

just going through the motion..

the whole world is screaming for Jesus.

hahaha.i was randomly reading ah xin's old post he said he was listening to beatles "all you need is love" haha and i got my ipod out and listened to it.its such a classic and cute song la.haha.sometimes a break from all the bubblegum/pop/punk genre is cool.all the saxaphones and trumpets and stuff.haha.

its like someone happily twirling her skirt and skipping around the field that kinda feel.haha.its quite interesting to note that oldies or all these 'classic' bands their songs are always happy happy(okay maybe only one or two sad ones) and so different from the era now.full of angst and anger.

all you need is love,love is all you need. :)

we had our inaugural tp prayer meeting today. (haha!new word from xiaoting!means initial/first.haha!) its coool!even if theres only like,4 of us.haha.

eh listening to beatles really makes me happy!hahaha.

my grandma just called.she sounded so fragile and weak..omg.

what will you leave behind when you die?

so random.but well..

nowadays i just cant find the words to express what i wanna say.haaa.jiaxin i understand how you feel now.haha.

OKAY i'm gonna update.or else i'm really getting nagged at every second.seriously.hahaha.

Life is precocious in a most peculiar way.

precocious means showing unusually early development or maturity.

eh i think its so cool.haha.that line.but its not from me la.haha.its a line from a song.haaa.

its really a wonder how our lives cross.

was just thinking about some stuff..and suddenly i was reminded of all the pri sch days and sec sch days.

like how we used to promise each other we'll still be best of friends and all.but in the end..we are just like strangers now.

its like periods of your life you'll have this group of really close friends but in the end they are just convenient friends.and when you move on to another period of your life,they'll be gone.

haaha.aiya.i shall end here.hahaha.

and huiying!you better let me eat your cheesecake!!

its irritating not to update your blog and its over the two-days limit already so i shall blog.hahaha.




and omg i feel so stupid can.i was marking several pics on my hp to send over to the laptop and accidentally pressed the 'delete marked pics' button then..i deleted all la!we took like..twenty over pics today but now left 15!hahaha.and yes yulan,that includes all your pics with jp and john and your lego.lol.so sorry..

AND this is the first bbq i handled without any yulan or ying's help okay.so its only me and juanjie all the way so it was pretty funny cos we seriously know nothing about anything.hahaha.i finally got to know how to do alot things.haha.like how to cut a garlic.and its such an experience seriously.its so fun too!haha.(btw its because i think i heard garlic for ginger cos i dont think you need garlic in marinating right?hahaha.)

cheewee demostrating how to cut garlic to me!haha!i'm a girl can.then a guy teaching me how to do all these stuff.haha.

we fired alot of photographers while taking this shot.but its still quite unsuccessful i guess?hahaha.very funny la.

eh whats that guy's name in deathnote?haha.really got a bit sama right!hahaha.jp drew eyeliner today!

this is another take-a-lot-of-times shot.haha.cheesiang's house the lighting really a bit not suitable har.hahaha.and!i didnt realise john cheo is so much taller than me!


eh still got alot more one lor..but..haha.so sorry man yulan.hahaha.

omg my fingers still smell of the chicken wings!no i think its all the ma you oyster sauce and garlic thing.haha.

and nowadays i'm really confused between
learned and learnt
passed and past.
hahaha!

hahaha.i slept at like 4am ytd morning then huiying woke me up at 11.30am say shes on the bus coming my house can..its only 7and a half hours of sleep..

huiying is sooooooo childish man!hahaha.

ytd night/morning was emo emo man.haha.i was reading jiaxin's letter then everything was like so still around me.that blank period of time.that kind of peace and quiet is like so loud around me can..haha.if it makes sense.and the occasional car screech and maybe someone playing some late night mahjong..wasnt thinking anything in particular but about life generally.if only love had conquered this world instead..and we are all in this 'life' thing.

jiaxin makes me wonder..always..

hahaha.some pictures first.
angel and ying and john cheo while queueing.i think they were trying to create the alot-of-people effect.haha.
me and ying with rainft!haha.i still think his name is so unique.

yay with julian!haha!hes the tallest.lol.
eh i like this picture alot somehow.haha.yulan and valerie and me.haha!

haaha.yeah emerge is over..so fast la.it has been so physically draining and i realised i actually fell asleep a little while watching POS on the first night.haha.so ytd when SIM/SMU performed i was like huh?got this part meh? hahaha!

ytd's finale was so great lor..and i just used all my strength and energy left to keep jumping and praising God and that kinda feeling rocks man.haaa.and ytd when we all knelt down..the feeling was so overwhelming.and so precious..

i felt so contented and happy just standing there and worshipping God..its seriously better than attending mayday's concert a hundred and thousand times.its like a hole there that can only be filled by God..

well ytd i was taking 17 back home from bedok interchange.haha!i really really miss taking 17 lor.i was sitting at the seat i used to sit everyday to school..haha.and i realised i have been taking 17 for the past 5 years!haha.(eh and right,i think i did grow taller cos ytd the legs there the space very limited not like last time.haha!)

and the feeling is so weird lor..remember last time this girl with ahs uniform and my big adidas bag sitting there and around the 4th stop i'll fall asleep all the way to school.haha.then along the way,familiar people will board the bus etc etc.or using the 30min-45min bus ride to pia all the notes into my head last-minutely for the test later..and when huiying will occasionally decide to take 17 with me i'll sms her the bus plate number.haaha.

then ytd like this grown-up girl sitting on the same seat but so different from last time..and how alot of my thinking and stuff changed from the last time i sat there.

and right..alot things changed lor.like theres this new sheltered walkway at that bus stop etc.

it was a pretty weird bus ride home.haha.

and i finally got chance to sleep for 13 hours!haha.so shuang.

anyway!yay!we won caps ball!heee.it was so nerve wrecking can.with all the fierce defenders punching you everywhere.haha.


the guitar picks!!hahaha!(eh its spelt like that right??) the left one is 2005's stone's the right one is monster's!haaaha.got different brand for picks one not ar?haha.

just got back from mayday's concert..it was a blast.all the passion and that kinda feel its like..cannot describe one lor.and my ears are still ringing..its 3 hours of loud loud rock music..

before the concert started there was this video..and its like talking about the world hopeless and dying..and wars,guns everywhere.and there was this little girl who stood in front of ashin and he asked,what are you doing here?then he gave her a necklace telling her its hope.and suddenly the whole place like got bombed so they were running..and the necklace dropped on the floor.then this weird ailen or something stepped onto it and crushed it.and the cool part is ashin saw and those ailens were pointing their guns at him then his eyeballs the white part changed to black.

its like so cool can..i dont know if the meaning is this but i thought its like..the hope disappeared or something,thats why changed to black.i was tearing when i watched this video..i was thinking why a secular and totally unchurch people can catch the message so strongly.and still trying to live their lives to make a difference in so many others too.setting the standard out there and that theres still hope and love.

during the first song i really cried lor i really felt so so impacted.how i felt God's common grace so strongly and its like..theres so so much more that we must do.

throughout the concert it was just a blast.the passion when they are playing their guitars and it was just so wow.it can be seen and felt seriously..

i love one part of the concert when a ten-year old appeared on the screen then ashin was talking to him,asking who is he and what is he doing here.the boy replied hes his past and hes there to see if he did grow up to become what he wanted to be when he was ten-years old.and that if hes still running after his dream.

oooh monster threw his guitar pick and i got it.haha.i can start a collection already.and ashin walked through the first row i was as near as you reading this now to him.but i didnt dare like..touch him or what.haha.but hes seriously sooooo charming can.

but the irritating part is that ashin kept running to the other side of the audience and only came here like..a few times.BUT.i'm very very pretty sure we did make eye contact. :) while he was singing one of the lovey songs.haha!

they didnt sing my fave song.the luan shi fu sheng.and so many other classics.so quite sad.haha.

i still feel so empty.i missed out on the session...

wah i'm getting a bit emo emo now so many things running through my mind.i better stop.