this came through my mail, a Max Lucado subscription.and i think its really heart-warming and true:

"When desperation typhoons into your world, God’s offer of a free flight home demands a second look. John 3:16 morphs from a nice verse into a life vest.

Some of you are wearing it. You can recount the day you put it on. These words have kept you company through multiple windswept winters. I pray they warm you through the ones that remain."

i like the image of a 'life vest'.and so often,it is so true.

somehow,i feel in my heart that i'm being prepared for something.just that something that's gonna happen.i've no idea what.but just that.

anyhow,a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you my darling jiaxin!haaha.okay.sorry i didnt drop a sms.cos i'm pretty pissed by my phone nowadays i just dont feel like touching it.your s-u-r-p-r-i-s-e is ooonnnn the wayyy!hahaha.but it may take some time yeah!and i'm sure you'll be reading this.haha.you are one of the silent readers around.

and yes,while bathing just now,i realised i talk to myself alot.like really alot.and all the time.and nowadays my fave topic with myself is trying to think of a perfect blog post to end this year.and how i'll evaluate this year.no idea why i'm 3 months ahead.haha.and i'll argue within myself.haha.

maybe cos nowadays i'm running over what happened this year alot.and what i've learned from the various events.

its pretty cool to reflect.

and,not being pessimistic in any way.but i just feel that my grandpa wont survive this year round.he can hardly talk now.with all those tubes stuffed into his throat.and his stomach is like,huge.

i dont know what to say..but.its really miles away from his past.happy seeing me visiting him again and such.

well,lesson learnt: drinking is really really bad for your health.