20 years of life, i've learnt to do lots of things. i've learnt to photoshop etc, operate the different softwares amateurishly...

but i still havent learnt how to control myself. my own emotions, my own thoughts. this is one area that i have so much trouble in controlling. i wish someone can just take hold of these areas of my life and just help me to control them. these things... they will be the fall of me someday.

i give in too much to my emotions. i let them stray me too far away from where i'm supposed to be.. i let them control my life too much.. and i know its not healthy. but i cant help it. these inner monsters. they devour all the life in me and the optimism.

i wish life is as easy as a formula. as easy as a solution. as easy as a clear-cut answer to a hard question. this is something that i struggle so much with in my life...

i wish i was stronger in alot of areas. i wish i was someone else. wish that i wasnt this timid. wish my emotions wouldnt control me.

but i'm not.

and this will be one hard battle i have to keep fighting. until i fight these inner monsters away...

太感性真的不是件好事。